Suicide Prevention Week

September is Suicide Prevention month so I am declaring it to be “Boost your self esteem month” too!!!  And, it’s the start of Suicide Prevention week.

Low self-esteem

Low self-esteem can lead to depression, anxiety, and stress – and that can lead to more serious things like suicide.  If you’re constantly thinking “I don’t know how to get better”, please read on because this is why stress and depression should be taken seriously.  It’s suicide prevention week and I want to prevent suicide.

Abusive relationships and self esteem

If you’ve ever found yourself in an abusive relationship, you know what a hit it takes to your confidence and self-esteem.  The abuser (the one doing the abusing) knows how to break you down to the point where you no longer feel as if you have any power.

One example is if you’ve had a critical parent.  A critical father can give you low self-esteem as well as a critical mother.  It depends on your relationship with them and how it may affect you.  Usually, the same sex parent can have a bigger impact.  For example, if you are a female, and your mother is abusive, you are more likely to have more trauma to your confidence.  Likewise, if you are male, your low self-esteem would be a result of your critical father.

But, it doesn’t have to be a parent.  It could be a caregiver, a boyfriend or girlfriend, or even your boss.  I’ll give you a personal example.

I used to have a boss who always made me feel like I couldn’t do anything right.  No matter how hard I tried, I always was made to feel “less than” and unworthy.  I would go into meetings as prepared as I could, but never had the self-confidence because I knew that my hard work wasn’t going to be noticed.  Basically, it just wasn’t going to be good enough.  This led to apathy and low self-esteem.  As much as I tried to stand up for myself, the abuser knew how to work the system.

Eventually, I took back my power by leaving.  It was the right thing for me to do for my emotional well-being.  I never felt freer!

How low self-esteem can lead to substance abuse

Whatever the situation, low self esteem can lead to substance abuse.  This is because we feel like we’ve lost control and we want to gain it back but don’t know how.  You may feel hopeless, which can lead to alcohol or drug abuse and low self esteem and social anxiety go hand in hand.

We need to turn the hopelessness into hopefulness.  The emotional, physical, and mental abuse you do to your body isn’t worth it.  Tell yourself that “maybe the best thing I can be is me” but you’ll need support in order to do that.   The only thing you can really fight for is yourself because you can’t count on anyone else to fight for you.  It’s a bad world out there but you can make it better.

How to build self esteem after an abusive relationship

Do sports and other physical activities build self esteem?  Yes, they do.  Physical activity is one of the best ways to start building back your self-esteem and confidence.  If you don’t feel ready to play a team sport, go for a walk.  I know it may be hard to get out when you’re feeling down, but commit to 5 minutes today and continue the 5 minutes until you feel you can do 15.  Eventually, make it up to 30 minutes and you will start to feel better.

My other suggestion would be to talk to someone.  My hope is you have someone you can turn to.  If you, do – that’s wonderful.  If you don’t, I’d like you to reach out to other Resources.

So, do you think you have what it takes?  I know you do!  Tell me how I can help by leaving me a comment.  It’s boost your self-esteem month and suicide prevention week!  Be happy be yourself if others don t like it, too bad!  Declare today:  “I am enough self-esteem”!!!

Day 5 Self Confidence Challenge for Suicide Prevention Week

Sometimes we think we need to do something complicated in order to make ourselves feel better.  I used to think this was the case, too.  But, in trying to figure out the best thing to do, I realized that sometimes the simplest things are better.  Here’s an example of what I mean.

I used to think that I needed to meditate everyday and if I missed a day, I would need to start over.  While I do think meditation is beneficial, the thought of having to do it on a regimented basis was overwhelming to me.  Plus, when I would meditate, I always thought I was doing it wrong.  I realized as long as you are trying, you are doing it the right way because eventually, you’ll start to calm down.  And, you will notice a difference.  In fact, try mindfulness for depression.

For those who have a hard time meditating and want to work on Day 5 of our Challenge, try this:  focus on an object – any object.  Some people use a candle flame; some people just pick any object in the room.  The point is that it doesn’t matter.  Pick an object and rest your attention there.  Sometimes I just pick a spot on the floor or I look at a picture.  I just stare at it until I feel almost “trance-like”.  This has an amazing calming effect for me and helps me “center” myself.

Ironically, I feel better about myself afterwards because I’m giving myself time to breathe, time to focus, time to not have to think about anything.  Try it the next time you need a break during Suicide Prevention week and boost your self esteem!

For yesterday’s Challenge, click here…

I am enough Self Esteem – Day 4 of our Challenge

It’s suicide prevention week so go out and prevent suicide.